Tuesday, December 13, 2011

JP Morgan Actions Over MF Gobal to be Probed

Bloomberg headlines indicate JPM will be probed over its actions involving MF Global.
JPM's stock is plunging on the news, down 2.3% to $31.30.

*JPMorgan Actions as MF Lender Called Likely to Be Probed
*Certain actions likely to be subject to investigation

A JPM probe is likely to go something like this...

Carl Levin/ Turbo Timmy/ CFTC former Goldman Sachs goon/former CME goon: Hey Jamie- did you get enough?

Jamie:  Well, we got enough gold and silver to make it through December- February's still looking like it might be an issue though. 

Levin/ Timmy/ Genz/ Shapiro:  We might be able to get you the phyzz from Jefferies' clients, might be hard though....they're all cashing in and buying at APMEX. 

Jamie:  I was thinking more like Germany's vaults.  They obviously don't need it. 

Levin/Timmy/ Genz/ Shapiro:  Um, Jamie, we already discussed this.  We already lent you guys Germany's stuff back in the 90's. 

Jamie:  Well, get me Brink's stuff then.  I'm telling ya, I wouldn't wanna be you if we can't make it through February. 

Levin/Timmy/Genz/Shapiro: Ok, we'll see what we can do.  Oh, and we're supposed to talk to you about the rehypothecated MFG client funds...we'll need a statement from you by the morning that you had no knowledge of any of that.

Jamie:  Will do.  See you at the club at 9?